they're usually immature and inexperienced, so they tend to fail for those reasons (*editing to point out this is in MY experience and people i have known. They've also taught you how you want to be treated and respected, both in and out of the bedroom. Seriously people, wear sunscreen. First boyfriend. Relationships in your 20s don’t have to mean the end of your self discovery. Years later I weigh roughly 40lbs less than I did at the end of high school (it's creeping up on me since I took a desk job last year but I'm making lifestyle changes to correct that), I try to lift heavy weights 3x/weekly and - now that winter is truly over - I'm making a point to get outside and move more for cardio. I work with a lot of older hippies, construction workers, landscapers, and arborists and a lot of them have skin cancer and they all really wish they had worn sunscreen. You begin to form a vision of what you want a relationship to feel like and look like. the changes people go through can get in the way if one person changes too much and then the values/needs can't jive well any longer. Nobody is gonna walk up to you and hand you a meaning to your life or a fulfilling career. There are worse things than being single.-allthebacon_and_eggs. Our relationship turned sour, and some people have even said it turned abusive (although I try to stay away from that idea) We couldn't spend time with each other without him screaming at me for whatever reason. A good friend of mine recently came to terms with his alcoholism. I'm married to the same woman for over three decades. I know people that get into serious relationships at an early age. I had a real bad boy complex. (Unless you can travel together, but that seems pretty financially impossible.) We do it out of fear. They also get your relationship problems out in the open so you can identify the issues you both have and work to resolve them. By long distance, I mean really, really long distance -- like, across the Atlantic Ocean, nonstop flight from JFK to London Heathrow long distance. Sometimes it seems easier to move on to than it is to step back and look at what went wrong and what could be repaired. I met my husband a few weeks shy of my 21 birthday. Which everyone told me constantly. Put in the work now so you can suffer less later. More: The advice everyone in their mid 20s should listen to, More: The things you should do in your 20s so you don't have regrets in your 30s, The advice everyone in their mid 20s should listen to, The things you should do in your 20s so you don't have regrets in your 30s, Show{{#moreThan3}} {{value_total}}{{/moreThan3}} comments. In other cases, however, both people end up suffering. You don't try to make your life plan conform to theirs and vice versa. I started a relationship with someone when I was 13 and ended it at 19. You know things about them that nobody else does and you keep their secrets safe as if they were your own. How do you think about the answers? There's no doubt that those guys can have awesome personalities, but you've started to realize, so do the guys who don't fit that mold. Getting sunburned just once can triple your risk of melanoma later in life. If you're on the fence, you let them know. But I'm one of those people who has to make their own mistakes. Breakups can actually be a good thing if they make you realize how badly you want to be with the person you fell out with. I met my husband a few weeks shy of my 21 birthday. When I was talking with an older friend who was very well off, millionaire, I jokingly said, 'I'll trade you my age for your money.' Long gone are the days when you abide by the rules of texting or not texting until after a set period of time, or the ambiguous Snapchats to string them along. If you can laugh about anything, you can get through everything. i started a relationship with someone at 15 and we dated for 7 years.. i was a completely different person with different ideas of how my life was going to go by the end of things. Young Leonardo DiCaprio could approach you with a bottle of Merlot and a box of condoms and you would still turn him down. As you move through your 20s, you learn more effective ways of communicating, how to take responsibility for your part in arguments, how to recover from them and how they can actually build a stronger foundation for a relationship. But as you move closer to those late 20-something years, things start to shift. If you never learn how to be on your own, you’ll continue to be dependent on others. What concerns me is that I learned and grew a lot being single in my 20s and found out what I wanted in a lasting relationship while dating. Even if your significant other doesn't tell you everything, they tell you a lot. That just seems like a waste of everyone's time. But how we interact with them and move toward receiving and giving them are markedly different as we move into and through adulthood. No matter how hard you try to open your heart to other people, you just can't give up on that one person. When the worst thing that can happen is the same as if you never tried, TRY. They're still in their early 20s, does that count? Why is it so hard to meet new people now. If you find that right person then yes. Relationships can last in a person's 20's, 30's and beyond. 1. Yes, I've know most of my best friends for almost ten years now. He dumped me after a year of dating, and I was heartbroken. If you really want to be together, you'll make it work, but planning to sacrifice your dreams to make someone else's happen is bound to make you resent them in the future. But sometimes these poor choices can have a lasting impact on you as you grow older. Started a relationship at 16 in junior year of high school, still going strong 8 years later. Married my high school sweetheart; been together 10 years. Right? Your 20s are a time of self-discovery, not continued dependence. "'That that don't kill you can only make you stronger' --Kanye West --Me.". He's my best friend, there's no one I'd rather be with to hang out with rather than him. Started dating in high school, now married 7 years later. Dating is hard at any age, but it gets harder as you get older. Most of the time, I feel stuck in a rut; my life is like the ever-so-classic cliché of “can’t live with him, can’t live without him.”. It may seem like a weird indicator of a solid relationship, but it's totally true that people who tend to be a little flexible and not take themselves too seriously manage to stay together longer. As a 20-something, I’m considerably new to the real world. As part of our commitment to that mission, the AskWomen subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit. 6 years ago. If you guys have any chance of sticking together, it means taking on each other's problems and not giving up when the honeymoon stage of your relationship is over. I'm a fan of drag shows, one of my friends is a drag queen there was 0 way he was going to stop me from going out. It was like you tested each guy to see how far you could push them to prove they were worthy of you. We had one major fight almost a year into our marriage, where he slept over at his parents for a few days but we're still married, 8 years later and 2 kids and still going strong. Answer Save. Don’t actively look for someone to spend the rest of your life with, but if someone comes along and it feels right, don’t ignore it. Press J to jump to the feed.